Mark Rees 6 December 1942 –26 July 2023

The Funeral is at 2pm on Wednesday 23 August. Further details are at the bottom of this page

Donations in remembrance of Mark may be made to Water Aid or The Hospice in the Weald.

Mark Rees, a trans man who underwent gender reassignment in the early 1970s, has passed away at the age of 80. A teacher, activist and author, Mark’s life was marked by a commitment to living authentically as the person he knew himself to be and fighting for the rights of people like himself to Respect and Equality.

It was a mission that would bring change not only to his life but to the lives of thousands of trans people here in the UK. Those changes were to ripple across the world, improving the lives of millions of trans people. Mark’s life was marked by courage and resilience, and he will be remembered for his pioneering advocacy and relentless pursuit of justice for the trans community.

Mark was born in Tunbridge Wells, Kent in December 1942, apparently a daughter to Hubert (known as William) Rees, a Merchant seaman and later ship’s officer and Alice (known as Billie) a secretary and excellent, often in demand, pianist. Named Brenda, Mark was the only survivor of very premature twins, consequently, he was a ‘delicate’ child, and his early schooling was frequently disrupted due to health problems. The family then moved to Rusthall a suburb village of Tunbridge Wells.

As a young child Mark's parents had taken a very liberal attitude towards social gender roles and allowed Mark and his sister to choose the toys they preferred. Mark assumed he would grow up to become a boy and man like his father. Though his father was often at sea for extended periods during his childhood, Mark had very fond memories of his father as an understanding and generous man. Mark was devoted to his mother who become one of his greatest advocates.  In his late twenties he returned home to live with and care for his mother until her death. He then remained in the family home until he moved into a care home a few months before his death.

Mark was devastated when he failed his 11 plus exam and had to watch his friends go to the local grammar school whilst he was sent to the secondary modern. At thirteen he moved to Tonbridge County Technical School where he discovered the trans defence of being the class clown. Puberty brought changes to his body that he hated. In the late 1950s girls were expected to wear a bra, petticoat, suspenders and stockings but he refused to leading to many battles with his mother. It wasn’t just the physical changes of puberty but also the social changes that he hated. He hated all that came with growing up ‘as a girl'.

On leaving school Mark worked as a clerical administrator,  a laboratory technician, a taxi driver in Tunbridge Wells. He then spent 2 years in the Navy as a Wren. In the Wrens he liked the instant companionship and structured life. Unfortunately, he was plagued by his desire to become a man and found it difficult to settle. The WRENS medically discharged him when he admitted he might be a homosexual – a word he used because he knew no other.

In 1969 as he left the WRENS, his father suddenly died. Amidst the grief he read a report in the Times newspaper about the 1969 International Symposium of Gender Identity which had been held in London with the support of the Albany Trust. Mark wrote to the Trust and through Doreen Cordell, its administrator, he was to meet Dr John Randell the psychiatrist who had opened a gender reassignment clinic at Charing Cross Hospital in London. Dr Randell said he would treat Mark if he could show he could live as a man.

Throughout this period, Mark studied for extra qualifications until he obtained the A’levels required to matriculate and aged 28, he embarked on a new career. He really wanted to train as a doctor, but after being rejected by the medical schools he accepted a place to study dentistry at Birmingham University.  it was to be a defining period of his life.

His first year was amongst a small group of other students with less traditional backgrounds or wrong A levels studying Medicine and Dentistry and within this group he made lifelong friends. It was also at the end of this first academic year that he transitioned from Brenda to Mark. He returned after the summer as Mark, as always that quiet thinking person. He found his friends and his place: the Church and Religion were always there, but also he had a quick and keen sense of humour with friends, and he loved music and singing. Mark refers to the joy he felt at this time:

“I remember at the beginning of the second term going to the Matron's Ball dressed up in a dinner-suit and with a girlfriend on my arm. That was how I was meant to feel. Changing roles was like having walked around all my life with a great boulder on my back, then suddenly finding it was gone. The relief!“

But the third clinical year was a challenge too much. He decided to leave Birmingham and dentistry behind. English language study was more suited to his temperament, and he subsequently completed a degree in English Literature at Christchurch College, Canterbury. Mark sang bass in the local choral society and enjoyed church music in particular. Despite later becoming an agnostic, Mark continued to explore Christianity and the Church of England in depth throughout his life, and in 2007 he gained a postgraduate diploma in Theology Studies from the South East Institute of Theological Education.

Despite generally being private about his change of gender, Mark was always honest about his background whenever it mattered; applying for work, or when there was a possibility of romantic interest, with close friends, neighbours and when he fought a local council election as a Liberal candidate. When studying in Canterbury he chose to be server in the Cathedral so that he could:
“appear so deliberately in the public eye (it) was my way of saying to everyone… ‘Here I am, neither ashamed nor afraid. Just look and see that I’m quite ordinary."

Unfortunately, that honesty meant that in 1978 the Archbishop Of Canterbury, Dr Donald Coggan, refused him permission to train for ordination because the
“Church of England did not at that time ordain women and because, in the eyes of the law, (he) was a woman."

It was this and other rejections, which drove Mark to seek justice. In the early years of Mark's change, after returning to Rusthall, being open about his trans identity was met with resistance and often outright hostility, particularly from local young people whose torments continued for years. Nevertheless, Mark began a personal campaign for the recognition and rights of transsexual individuals. In 1980, he petitioned the European Court of Human Rights for the right to change the gender on his birth certificate. While his petition was rejected, the impact of his case reached far beyond the confines of Mark’s own situation. His application to the Court became the first of many from trans people in the UK. Rees v UK became a landmark case that set the stage for the later victory that came in Goodwin & I v UK in 2002.  

Despite the failure of his case at Europe, Mark worked tirelessly to create a world where trans people could live without fear or prejudice, pushing for greater acceptance. In February 1992, Mark made an appointment with Alex Carlile MP, (later Baron Carlile of Berriew) in his parliamentary office. The meeting with Alex Carlile was inspirational. Alex handed out cups of tea and three key pieces of advice; to go over Parliament Square to Granny’s Café and organise yourselves; write a letter of no more than one side of an A4 sheet of paper and send it with a glossy leaflet to every new and returning Member of Parliament in the forthcoming election; and finally, to get a name for your organisation which didn’t include the ‘T’ word if you want your letters to be read.

Over in the café, hands were put into pockets until the group of 6 had managed to find £500, enough to buy whatever was needed for the letters and glossy brochure. Mark led the brainstorming for the name of the organisation. This was about change, the need to change attitudes, particularly the need for the press to start writing about us in a respectful and realistic manner, the law had to change, the work to be done would lead to change, and of course, it was about our ‘sex changes’. By 5.30pm the organisation Press For Change had come into being. Mark featured on the glossy brochure with text saying: “This man cannot” and a list of things he was not allowed to do, actor Mjka Scott appeared on the other with a similar text but “This woman cannot”.

That was just the start. Mark then organised a fringe meeting of the Liberal Party Conference that year at which several of us spoke. From then on, Press For Change, regularly featured in fringe meetings at Party Conferences. Mark did not become a key player in the management of what was an entirely grassroots organisation, simply because technology became key to the campaign, and he felt he could not keep up with that. Yet, he brought many high profile people on board as patrons of Press For Change including Jan Morris, Claire Raynor and even South Africa’s Archbishop Desmond Tutu.  

Mark was always active and willing to turn out and speak wherever and whenever a speaker was needed. When the Gender Recognition Act was passed in 2004, despite having become a ‘disenchanted agnostic’ by then, he organised a church service “The Gender Recognition Act 2004, Reflection and Thanksgiving” attended by trans people and their allies which was held in May 2005 at St Anne’s in Soho.

Mark was proud of living in Rusthall despite the abuse he got from the local cowards every time he walked through the park next to his home. He was clearly widely respected, and he became the first trans man to be elected as a local councillor, serving Tunbridge Wells from 1994-98. Mark was also involved in the setting up of a local charity shop and raised thousands of pounds towards the Kent Air Ambulance service.

When he was 65 Mark was told he had an inoperable heart condition and could drop dead any day. After a few weeks panic, he decided he might as well get back on his bicycle and go for walks in the woods, as they were as good a way as any of dying. He also got his first job in many years, teaching English to Adults. He was a great believer in lifelong learning for himself as well as others.

Mark’s dedication to the trans community was recognized by numerous organizations and his work was featured in several documentaries and publications. He wrote articles for publication in small local and some national magazines, and his autobiography “Dear Sir or Madam” an extremely a frank and honest account of his life and struggles – still recognisable experiences for many trans people today – was published by Cassell in 1996. An updated edition was published by Mallard in 2009. The book remains a powerful testament to the challenges and triumphs of living as a trans person in a world that is often less than accommodating.

Mark is survived by many friends in Rusthall and by the millions who were touched by his tireless advocacy for trans rights. The strides made in the fight for equality, were made in no small part due to Mark’s dedication and tenacity. His legacy will be remembered by the wider trans world, as one of courage, persistence, and ultimately, triumph in the face of adversity.

(2023 © Stephen Whittle)

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Mark Rees
Biography frpm the https://lgbtqreligiousarchives.org/ 

Mark (nee Brenda) Rees, the sole survivor of premature twins, was born in December 1942 in Tunbridge Wells, Kent. A sister was born in 1946. Although their parents were not active church members, the children were baptised into the Church of England and sent to Sunday school. Both attended the village school which was linked to the parish church and then Brenda moved on to a Church of England secondary school. After two years she gained a scholarship and moved to another school.  Although this was not church-affiliated it had a very strong mainstream Christian ethos. It was here that Brenda began to learn about biblical criticism. This prompted an interest that has remained with Mark ever since.

Although Brenda was a tomboy during childhood, it was not apparently considered a problem until early puberty when, unlike her peers, she refused to adopt feminine dress and behaviour. Unlike her fellow pupils, rather than wear the school summer uniform of pastel dresses, she preferred to swelter in the school winter uniform of shirt, tie, skirt and blazer because that was less feminine than a frock. By now she regarded herself as cursed by her female body. Indeed her fervent prayer to God was that she would change sex. In spite of her increasing unhappiness, she continued to believe that God would help her.

As she moved through adolescence she was increasingly in conflict with her parents over career options and training. At this time there was still rigid demarcation between jobs for men and women and Brenda resisted female jobs. In desperation, she left school and started a course at the local art college but from the start her increasingly ambiguous appearance led to countless taunts from fellow students. This added to her already fraught state and at the age of 17 she was eventually admitted to a psychiatric hospital as a voluntary patient.  The early period of this three-month stay was a refuge from the abuse and questions she faced so often at the art college and elsewhere. The hospital offered little other relief. Her psychiatrist told her to, “Enjoy being a woman.” With the co-operation of the psychiatrist and her former headmistress Brenda was enabled to return to her old school and take further examinations. It was her haven but she knew that she would soon be thrust into a seemingly unkind world.

Very reluctantly she left school and took a clerical post but resolved to join one of the services. Now hampered by her recent psychiatric history, she received several rejections but at the age of twenty was eventually accepted into the Women’s Royal Naval Service in 1963.

After basic training, she was stationed at the Royal Naval Air Station, Culdrose, Cornwall as a motor transport driver. She decided that to avoid problems she would live out her expected female role. It didn’t work. This she realised when her officer asked her why she was mannish. That problem was exacerbated by the fact that she found one of the other servicewomen attractive Yet she knew that she was not homosexual and did not want to have a physical relationship with a woman as a woman. In those times however, the services took a dim view of what was perceived as homosexuality, and so stress was growing. Brenda’s one confidant during this difficult period was the naval chaplain. (Forty years later he and Mark are still in contact.) It was no surprise and indeed almost a relief to Brenda when, after two years’ service she was discharged from the WRNS on medical grounds.
Brenda then spent a period of time studying for the qualifications necessary to apply for a place at medical school. It was her plan to bury her problem by dedicating herself wholly to serving others as a family doctor. Yet at it was always present and in spite of being told that a “sex-change” wasn’t possible, Brenda continued to hope.

She also attempted to find out if her problem were unique and in 1969 found the answer. In that year The Times (London) reported the proceedings of an International Symposium on Gender Identity. It described the condition of transsexualism and its successful treatment through gender reassignment therapy. At last, there was an explanation for her years of turmoil. She contacted the Albany Trust, which existed mainly to support homosexual people, and was given the name of their counsellor, Doreen Cordell, to whom she wrote. Mrs. Cordell responded immediately. With Brenda’s approval she passed on her letter to a consultant psychiatrist, John Randall, who worked with transsexual people. At their first meeting Dr.Randall declared that he could help Brenda live as a man if that was what she really wanted. Meanwhile her attempt to get into medical school was unsuccessful but she was accepted for the dental surgery course at the University of Birmingham. Initially, after discussions with Mrs. Cordell and Dr. Randall, Brenda took their advice and decided to change gender roles only after qualification as a dental surgeon. It was not a step that should be rushed.

Yet even with the prospect of a change of roles, stresses arose at university. Once again she found herself seeking and gaining great support from the clergy, this time the students’ union chaplain, a woman minister of the United Reformed Church. Brenda realised that her studies could be jeopardised by the strain of coping with the difficulties which arose as a result of living in the wrong sex for another five years. In the spring of 1971 she asked Dr.Randall if she could undergo hormone therapy to enable her to present as male. He agreed and in September of that year Brenda changed gender roles and name;and Mark set out for the first time. His vicar suggested that before returning to university Mark live for a week at the Anglican Franciscan Friary in Dorset, an all-male community, as preparation for returning to the dental school and home as a man. He never forgot that first week, an immense load had been lifted from him and he felt liberated. Nonetheless he withdrew from the dental course after three years; he knew that he wasn’t really dextrous or scientific enough to make a good dental surgeon. It had however been a valuable period. The university had supported him throughout his role-change, he had made some very good friends and had also become an active member of a Birmingham church. Here he became a server for the first time. 

Although clearly accepted as male from the start Mark knew that life would be made easier with surgery and he underwent a bilateral mastectomy in 1974 and a total hysterectomy in 1975.

This was not long before he began studies at an Anglican establishment, Christ Church College, Canterbury, where he had enrolled for a teaching course. He felt it imperative to undertake a vocational course although had some doubts about teaching children. So did his tutors but because he had shown academic ability he was invited to join the first ever BA course to be taught at the college. It was for a University of London BA in English Literature and Religious Studies. Mark felt that there was a parallel with his role change insofar as this new course had a feeling of “rightness,” of liberation, about it. He had already been studying English on the education course but was delighted to have the opportunity to undertake religious studies. To his surprise the Head of Religious Studies told him that since first meeting him at his interview she had hoped that he would study in her department. (The college was aware of his “past” because the law at that time did not permit legal recognition of transgender people in their new roles but nonetheless accepted him without any problem.)

Studying at an Anglican college and with Canterbury Cathedral as his local church where he was both a guide and a server, Mark felt that maybe he was being nudged towards ordination.   He realised that with a baptismal certificate in the name of Brenda, there could be problems so he wrote to the Archbishop of Canterbury. Dr. Coggan replied sensitively and courteously but had to inform Mark that because he was still legally a woman and at that time the Church of England did not ordain women, Mark could not be considered for the priesthood.

Since 1972 Mark had been doggedly contacting members of Parliament about the UK Government's refusal to change gender status given on a birth certificate. By 1979, with no sign any of progress and spurred further by his rejection by the Church, Mark decided to challenge the Government. through the legal system, eventually appealing to the European Commission for Human Rights. The Commission decided that Mark had a case, with the result that in 1986 he found himself in Strasbourg before the European Court of Human Rights. His request for anonymity was breached but he decided to carry on and make the most of the situation and use the resultant media attention to his and the transgender community’s advantage. Several months later Mark learned that his appeal had been rejected but rather than give up he was determined to continue the battle.  His prediction that others would follow him to the Court of Human Rights was to prove true.

On the day that the Court’s decision was handed down, Mark received a letter from the  Liberal Democrat MP and barrister, Alex (now Lord) Carlile who was to prove a great ally in the fight for legal recognition.  He agreed with Mark that a campaign needed to be organised. With his encouragement and support Mark organised a meeting which Mr. Carlile hosted in his House of Commons office in 1992.  It was attended by other lawyers and concerned transgender people. After the meeting, the group moved to a nearby café and there the campaign group, Press for Change was born. Its growth and success was to exceed Mark’s wildest hopes.

After twenty years of personal campaigning Mark was happy to take a step back and let younger, more computer literate and skilled PFC activists do their bit. He continued to write many letters, one effort being to contact all the diocesan social responsibility officers of the Church of England, over forty in all. Responses were very few but they were sympathetic. Since 1989 Mark has travelled the length of the UK speaking at local, regional and national Samaritan (Befrienders) conferences and other gatherings including police and church meetings.

In spite of being publicly known as transgender, Mark was elected by the people of his village to serve as a Member of Tunbridge Wells Borough Council from 1994-98. Some unwelcome publicity followed this but he was treated with friendliness and respect by both his fellow councillors and constituents. Their concern was that he fulfilled his role. His gender status was not their business. Mark found this attitude very helpful.

In 2004, the Gender Recognition Act at last became law. It had had overwhelming support in the House of Commons but there was some very vitriolic opposition from a few Christians, especially in the Lords. The Evangelical Alliance and the Christian Institute had conducted a long campaign to destroy the bill. Transgendered people were described as “vicious” by a CI member of the Lords and the CA called them, “deluded, deceivers and idolatrous.”  Mark wondered how many of these Christian people had actually met a transgendered person and how they could reconcile their attitude with the teachings of Jesus.

Understandably quite a number of transgender people still felt only anger and pain at the at they had been maligned and mistreated by those claiming to be Christian. In July 2004, in a letter published by The Church Times, Mark chastised the bishops who had opposed the Gender Recognition Bill in the House of Lords. This prompted invitations for him to write in a couple of Christian publications. One response also prompted him to put into action an idea which he had been considering for some time.
Although by now an avowed agnostic, Mark felt that it was very important that transgender people should see that there were many caring Christians who supported them. His idea was to use the recent Gender Recognition Act as an excuse to hold what he hoped would be a service of healing and reconciliation. This event, “The Gender Recognition Act 2004, Reflection and Thanksgiving,” was held in St Anne’s Church, Soho, London, 21st May 2005. It was attended by several priests, transgendered people and their supporters. Mark was amazed and moved by the number of people who came from his home parish, including the local vicar, who preached a very powerful sermon against Christians who would not show love. Ironically, within the preceding week the Act had been amended by a Statutory Instrument in order to accommodate the objections of the fundamentalists. As a result they have the right to check on anyone who they might suspect to be transgender. If the individual is so, these religious people are permitted by law to refuse him or her employment, accommodation or even entry to worship.

Mark knew that all the work he had done to prepare the service was rewarded when one of the transgender members of the congregation wrote that she had never believed that she could have felt so accepted. Another wrote, “The church was full of love”. Even the non-transgender members of the congregation found the event very moving.

In spite of no longer being a churchgoer, but still a perpetual student, Mark undertook a university course in applied theology at evening classes. He gained a diploma in 2007. During the pastoral studies class Mark was somewhat taken aback to hear the priest tutor tell the class to be prepared for anything and went on to mention her church organist who had been transgender. Mark had not disclosed his situation to any of his new colleagues but given that they were nearly all ordinands wondered if he should.  After reflection he contacted the tutor who invited him to talk to the students. They were very appreciative and some months later one of them told him that she had met a transgender person and was glad to have heard Mark’s story because it helped her to understand.

Several of the ordinands wanted to read his book, Dear Sir or Madam, but it had gone out of print and the publisher had declined to print any more copies. With continuing interest from many people, Mark decided to republish the book at his own expense. It was at least an opportunity to revise and greatly expand the book to include the major developments which had taken place since the 1996 first edition. He also included photographs. (The earlier edition had none). People who have read both editions say they prefer the later edition (2009) because it is more positive than the first. One priest reader called it "theological”.
With the Gender Recognition Act now law, Mark was now legally permitted to change his gender status to male. The fact that he would have lost his female state pension had he done so was a deterrent but fortunately Mark was in no hurry to make the change because he knew that it would make no difference to his life. Having been “outed” many years earlier and with very little likelihood of every marrying it was not an action he needed to take. Nonetheless when he reached male pensionable age he decided to register as male but only in order to bring “closure” to the second edition of his book. For him the Act was too late. Nonetheless, he had no regrets.

Considering the energy and bravery required to take on such immense challenges, Mark has remained a quiet and unassuming character, whose enduring ambition has been to build bridges and pursue reconciliation  with the very people who prevented him from achieving his vocation.

Biography Date: July, 2009
Tags
Church of England (Anglican) | Trans activism | United Kingdom
Citation
“Mark Rees | Profile”, LGBTQ Religious Archives Network, accessed July 27, 2024, https://lgbtqreligiousarchives.org/profiles/mark-rees.

Remembrances

“I met Mark in the late 1980s through attending a concert given by a small choir in which he was involved. The Clarendon Singers I think they were called. Subsequently I tried out a rehearsal, but wasn't quite ready for choral singing at that time. However, I discovered what a beautiful bass singing voice Mark has. We found that we shared a singing tutor at the time. We bumped into one another in Tunbridge Wells occasionally and stood around talking, sharing stories about our lives.

I always enjoyed that. Mark told me that he lived in Rusthall and cycled everywhere. He told me about his transsexualism. This helped me when a New Zealand cousin of mine announced to family and friends a number of years ago that he (now she) had been diagnosed with Gender Identity Disorder, had been cross-dressing since early childhood, had been undergoing hormone treatment, and was about to undergo surgery. She is now a women's advocate and has found it interesting to note how women are treated when compared with how men are treated inside and outside the workplace. Thank you, Mark, for all you have done to help transsexuals in the UK. I do look for you when I am in Tunbridge Wells.” 

– as remembered by Kathy Wallwork on July 18, 2018

“I was at Birmingham Dental School in the same year as Mark. Sadly we moved in different circles, and I was having my own issues with trying to be a man. I eventually started my transition thirty years ago. I was much moved by Mark's compelling account of his life. I remember him as a quiet, unassuming man and often wish I'd taken the opportunity to know him better.”
 – as remembered by Abby (Christopher) Hart on November 9, 2017